MAR
2004
APR
Sex and
Dating Tips Newsletter
–
Proven Sexual Techniques and Dating Advice
–
by John Francis
– View Newsletter Archives –
Quick
Explanation
Missing the Last Newsletter
I want to apologize for not writing the last newsletter,
the January/February 2004 issue. My father died at the end of 2003 and I
simply needed a break to come to come to terms with losing my dad,
grandmother, and younger brother in a three year span. (I also needed to convince my wife that my family isn’t cursed.)
I’m back, so let’s get on with this month’s newsletter …
This
Month’s Dating Tip
Dating Over Age 40
Dating over age 40 is pretty
broad topic, so we are only going to cover a few of the more common and
most important points. These days, one of the more common themes
of over 40 dating is dealing with divorce.
Divorce
and Identity
If you’ve experienced a
divorce over the age of 40, you know the powerful effect it can have on
your life. The divorce hits and everything is turned upside
down.
For many years, sometimes many decades, things were a particular way and
you knew exactly who you were. You might have been mom or dad,
husband or wife. Your former partner may have been your closest
friend at one point. Bottom line is, day after day you basically
knew what to expect. But with the divorce, you had that comfort zone
ripped away from you.
Of course you’re still mom or dad, a divorce can’t change that.
However, this role does slightly change when mom and dad are dueling it
out in court for custody or when the kids are shifting back and forth
visiting one parent then the other. The kids get a slightly different view of
mom and dad, not to mention dealing with seeing their parents no longer
together. Parents and children feel this new tension. And even
if it’s only mild, it’s there and it affects things.
On top of this, you’re alone. You may be better off. But it’s still new, and you still have to redefine your
identity — without your spouse and without the very familiar life you had for so many
years. That’s perhaps the downside. But I tend to think the
upside is usually pretty awesome, also.
Two Women
I dated two women in their 40s
who were both, at the time, recently divorced. Both women were going
through an identity crisis. I’m not
suggesting that they didn’t truly know who they were, that
wasn’t the case at all. Compared to a 25 year old, these women were
sharper, more worldly, and had a much better sense of life. Despite
this fact, there was still a loss of identity that took place during and after the
divorce.
Prior to getting divorced, these women had lived a certain way of life for
a very long time. One was married for 26 years and had two kids, the
other was married for 21 years and had a daughter. The second woman
added the burden of feeling like her divorce made her fail her Christian
faith.
Overall, both women felt that they were better off divorced, but both were
also pretty unhappy and feeling a bit lost. Their feelings are very
understandable. However, as I said, there is an awesome upside to
consider.
A New
Life Over 40
Whether you’re 40, 50, 60, or
older, life is still going (if you’re still breathing, it’s still going). And being single is as good or bad as
you make it. Feel free to have an identity crisis. Feel free
to be depressed. And feel free to feel a sense of loss. All of
these feelings are perfectly normal.
At the same time, don’t overlook the wonderful new opportunity you have
before you.
Most people typically get married for the first time while they are in
their 20s. Statistically speaking, at some point half of these
people will end up divorced. So who’s better off, the 50 percent who
stay married or the 50 percent who end up divorced? It’s an impossible
question to answer, but there are some definite advantages to dating when
you’re older. Here are three of the huge advantages of dating over 40:
-
You’re Far Better
Equipped
Fact is, most of us are not too sharp in our 20s. We think
we are at the time, but when we hit our 30s, we tend to realize just
how little we really knew. So if you’re over 40 and looking to
date, you have a huge advantage. You know who you are, you know
what you want out of life, and your values are well-defined. In
short, you are far better equipped to find a great match when you’re
over 40 than when you were in your 20s.
-
You’re More Likely to
Find a Great Match
Because of what I do for a living, I can say this for a
fact. For a living, I write books and articles on dating,
relationships, and sex. And I study my field constantly.
Everything I’ve seen and everything I’ve read indicates that people who
meet someone when they are over 40 are much more likely to do it for
better reasons than they did when they were 20. Doesn’t this
make sense? You’re not an
impulsive 20 year old. You think things through a lot
better. And as I said, you now know who you are, what you want out
of life, and you have your values well-defined. Isn’t this a
much better place to be when looking to meet someone? Enjoy the
fact that you’re older and wiser, and far more capable of finding
someone that is a great match.
-
You’re More in Demand
than You Might Think
Whether you’re a man or woman, being “older” doesn’t
mean you’re no longer attractive or no longer sought after.
Nothing could be further from the truth. Those two 40-plus year
old women I dated were both older than me — 19 years and 13 years
respectively. Did I mind the age gap? Not at all.
These two ladies had a sexiness that a 20 year old rarely
possesses. They were more sure of themselves, far more mature,
much more interesting to talk to and be around, and they had genuine life
experience to share with me. To me, this was extremely
attractive. And I’m not alone. If you go into any large
online dating service, you’ll find slews of people who have no problem
dating people who are much older or much younger. In fact, our
newsletter dating site review this issue focuses on Yahoo Personals,
which has one of the most diverse age groupings of any online dating
service. Click here to read the review
– or – click here to visit Yahoo
Personals.
To give you an idea, the term
“older woman younger man” gets 11,000 searches a month in the
search engines. If you’re 40 years old,
whether you want to date someone who’s 25 or 55, it doesn’t matter.
You can do either. It’s your world, define it as you see fit.
Go for it and have fun!
Proven
Ways for Men to Attract Women
For those of you who have read my articles and newsletters, and are interested in
looking into my books, here’s how:
Sex Secrets For Men —
Discover how to make women orgasm with ease, how to maintain an erection for
hours, the keys to getting women to pose nude, how to have sex with two women at
once, how to read a woman’s sexual signals, and a whole lot more.
Dating Made Easy For Men
— You’ll
learn how to overcome shyness, the best places to meet women, a proven pickup
line, how to easily start and maintain conversations, how to read women’s
signals, and much more.
How To Attract Women Online
— The keys to finding romance at online dating sites and chat rooms, including
in-depth instructions for writing winning personal ads, how to effectively
respond to ads, what to do in chat rooms, and a great deal more.
The Master Dating Course
— This is simply all three of my books, wrapped into one, and priced at a huge
discount. If you want to master every angle of attracting women and being
great in bed, this is the book for you.
“I have received other manuals and none of them were as well
written as yours! I am impressed. It is easy to read and
understand. Your “secret pick-up-line” works!
The literature also goes into detail about confidence and
goals. I have read many other dating books/manuals and this is
the best! This is the first one that made me believe I can do
it! Thanks again John and good luck!”
Aarin E. – Utah |
|
– Read more testimonials from
readers of my books –
Online Dating
Site of the Month
Yahoo Personals
Yahoo Personals
is one of the Internet’s best and easiest to use dating services. If
you’re familiar with Yahoo — the search engine, Yahoo e-mail, or any of the
other Yahoo features — you’ll find it that much easier. And with one of
the fastest growing member bases in online dating, you will also have an easy
time meeting great people. In addition, it’s free to join.
Since this issue of our newsletter covered dating over 40, it’s also
important to mention that
Yahoo Personals
just acquired Third Age Connections. Third Age Connections was an online dating service that focused on dating over 40.
With Yahoo Personals
already being one of the web’s biggest dating services, the addition of
Third Age Connections makes it the absolute best place for
over 40 singles to meet.
Here’s a look at what Yahoo
Personals
offers:
- Simplicity. Of all the
top dating sites we have reviewed, Yahoo Personals
is one of the easiest to use. If you are looking
for an excellent site that is easy to navigate and simple to use, you will really enjoy Yahoo Personals.
- Results!
The Yahoo network has the unique distinction of being the most used web
sites on the entire Internet. Yahoo Personals
is no exception. It is one of the most popular and fastest
growing online dating services, guaranteeing you excellent chances of
meeting interested singles. And because Yahoo has such immense
Internet usage, Yahoo Personals
is going to continue to rapidly expand and so will your
ability to meet people. This is definitely one of the web’s best
places to find romance.
- Excellent Pictures. Yahoo Personals
offers excellent photos in their personals. And with the ability to
post and view up to five pictures, you really get to see what someone looks
like.
- Mutual Matching. Yahoo’s Mutual
Matching feature is a great way to easily find a great match. It
highlights people who not only meet your criteria but who are also
interested in finding someone like you. A first Match Meter tells you
how well a person matches what you’re seeking, while a second Match Meter
tells you how you stack up to what the other person is looking for.
- Matches by Mail. This is
one of our favorite features. Yahoo Personals
will automatically find you excellent matches and will then send the results
to your e-mail. This means that you can actually meet people without doing any work to find them, and without even having your PC on.
It doesn’t get much easier than this.
- Voice and Video Greetings. For
those of you who like more high-tech features, Yahoo Personals
offers voice and video greetings. This is a nice way to get a more
personal feel of a person than just the ad alone. The voice greeting is
easy to set up and only requires that you have a phone.
-
Alerts. You’ll be notified when you have
new mail waiting for you or when someone is interested in you.
- In-depth
Searches. You have the option of basic search, advanced search,
keyword search, and Matchmaker search. This is a great way to
refine your search and to find what you’re really looking for.
This is simply a great dating service that is
incredibly easy to use. And with so many members, you will have no problem meeting
someone. Click here to meet over 40 singles at Yahoo Personals.
join Yahoo Personals for free
Feedback
and Suggestions
This newsletter is here to serve and benefit you, the reader. So do not
hesitate to tell us how we can improve things. In addition, you are
encouraged to suggest article ideas and to let us know what you think of the
newsletter. Simply email us at the below address:
[email protected]
That’s it for this issue. Thanks for reading Sex and Dating Tips!
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