APR
2003
Sex and
Dating Tips Newsletter
–
Proven Sexual Techniques and Dating Advice
–
by John Francis
– View Newsletter Archives –
This Month’s Sex Tip
Controlling
The Male Orgasm
The wonderful world of the penis. And what a fascinating
little topic it is. Just look at all the commonly talked about topics:
premature ejaculation … does size matter … how does a guy stay erect … can
creams really make you longer (wouldn’t your hands get bigger, too?!).
Today, we are going to cover one of these topics: the male orgasm. We’ll start by discussing …
Fantasy And Reality
Most men have amazing imaginations when it comes
to how long we hold out until we climax. In
a survey done by the University of Chicago, 69 percent of men said they lasted
between 15 minutes and an hour, while another 20 percent said they lasted over
an hour. In other words, nine in
ten males (89 percent) think they last 15 minutes or greater, and one in five
think they go better than an hour.
Not even close.
Almost all research done in this area concludes that most men orgasm in a couple
of minutes. In an eleven year study
done by Masters and Johnson, they tested thousands of men and found that most
men lasted two to three minutes. These
figures, of course, are nowhere near the 15 minutes to an hour the 69 percent of
men claimed, and are light years from the hour plus the other 20 percent stated
in the University of Chicago survey.
Our
inability (perhaps refusal) to see this realistically may explain why so many
women feel unfulfilled in bed. Because the first step to improving this
situation is to realistically recognize that it needs to be fixed. And
this is something men need to recognize, because the ten percent of
heterosexual adult women that have never orgasmed with a man are already keenly
aware of the problem.
So step one, much like any other problem, is admitting that all ain’t
well. If your performance is off and you’re not willing to even admit it
— or if you are too selfish to even try to please a woman in bed — this
article will only waste your time. If your performance is off and you
want to do something to improve it, let’s get down to business.
Understanding The Male Orgasm
I wanted to become incredible in bed and during
the early 1990s I was reading all sorts of stuff on sex. I studied
anything … from science-based literature, like the work of Dr. Graffenburg on
the G-spot, to stuff that seemed beyond ridiculous. My attitude was try
everything and see what worked.
One day, I came upon an article discussing the factual scientific process of
the male orgasm. I was shocked to learn that, for men, orgasm and
ejaculation are not one and the same thing. Yes, they do usually
happen simultaneously. But, they don’t have to.
Being a big fan of masturbation, I decided to experiment with this new
information to see if it was really true. Of course, I did this all in the
name of science and for the betterment of humanity. Lo and behold, it
worked!
After a lot of practice, I was finally able to orgasm without
ejaculating. Woo hoo! What did this mean from a practical
standpoint? It’s kind of like a canon in that I could put out
the fuse and re-light it without launching the canon ball until I was
ready. In short, I could maintain an erection, for a damn long time, until
I chose to ejaculate.
I remember very well that the woman I was dating at that time was very pleased
about this. Maybe a little too pleased, which kind of made me wonder how
well I was really doing in bed before I made this little discovery.
In any case, it was a cool discovery. One that has made a HUGE impact on
my sex life. I went from putting in an effort to last 15 minutes to being
able to stay erect for as long as I wanted to (if you master this technique, you
can hold out for a few hours, usually till you get sore or bored).
This is not to say that I last forever every time. That’s not the case. I
usually find that 20 to 90 minutes on average is fine. For me, doing too
much of anything, no matter how fun it is, can get repetitive and played
out. But it’s great knowing that I can call on this skill whenever I
please. Okay, so how has it affected my sex life?
For one thing, I learned that it’s easy for most women to orgasm during
intercourse. The main problem I used to have was that I gave out before
they got off. But if there’s intense connection or immense attraction
there, and as long as you last long enough, most women will orgasm during
intercourse. In some cases, very easily and sometimes over and over.
This was good.
Here’s what, at times, wasn’t so good … if you become really good in bed you
can have a hard time getting rid of women. Actually, this is true for men
and women. If you can really please someone in bed, they will
generally want to have you around. Sometimes, even when they can’t stand
you as a person or when you have zero in common with them.
Point is, things were getting good in bed. Women who didn’t much like me
wouldn’t leave me all that easily. Women who did like me now really liked me.
My overall sex skills were soaring and so was my confidence — both in and out
of bed. I got more bold sexually and more bold in everyday life.
Things were good and have only gotten better and better since.
But enough about me, you want to know how you can master this ability to
stay erect for as long as you feel like it. The answer is simple …
Practice, Practice, Practice
In my book, Sex Secrets For Men, I get into this
in detail. I’m not going to do that here. I’ll give you the right
map to follow, but I am not going to give you the same information that I give
to people that pay for my books. Plus, I think my knowledge is worth
something.
I spent 23 months writing my three books, am including my personal sexual
experiences with 91 different women, not to mention all the research I
did. If Bill Gates can make a PC platform that crashes all the time and
gets 40 billion dollars for it, I think my efforts are worth the $20 I charge
for my sex book.
But like I said, I will tell you exactly how to figure this out. And it’s
a fun process, so you won’t hate learning as you go. The solution is real
simple: masturbate.
Remember, ejaculation and orgasm are not one and the same. Yes,
they usually happen at the same time for men, but they don’t have to.
Masturbate and practice separating one from the other. It’s really pretty easy.
We can all tell when we’re ready to ejaculate, usually we get the signals about
15 to 60 seconds beforehand. Once you get these signals … STOP and do
not let yourself ejaculate.
If you stop and wait wait 20 or more seconds — this can be different for each guy — you
should still be erect and you will re-set the pipes. It’s like emptying
water out of a hose: the hose stays hard, but it needs to be re-filled with
water.
By practicing this, you will soon be able to control when you ejaculate.
In many instances, you will still experience the orgasm and all the sensations
associated to it. But without the actual ejaculation you will still be
hard. It’s a beautiful thing. And when you finally do decide to let
yourself ejaculate, what an orgasm!
If, for whatever reason, you are not into masturbation ( surveys say that
10 out of 10 men are into it), then I honestly don’t know what to tell you. Try one of the
many drugs or pumps on the market that don’t work. Maybe try praying.
But if you’re
willing to try this, and it’s simple and fun, you will master it in no time. Some
of you, who are really busy with yourselves, will get it in a day or two.
Best of luck!
Proven
Ways for Men to Attract Women
For those of you who have read my articles and newsletters, and are interested in
looking into my books, here’s how:
Sex Secrets For Men —
Discover how to make women orgasm with ease, how to maintain an erection for
hours, the keys to getting women to pose nude, how to have sex with two women at
once, how to read a woman’s sexual signals, and a whole lot more.
Dating Made Easy For Men
— You’ll
learn how to overcome shyness, the best places to meet women, a proven pickup
line, how to easily start and maintain conversations, how to read women’s
signals, and much more.
How To Attract Women Online
— The keys to finding romance at online dating sites and chat rooms, including
in-depth instructions for writing winning personal ads, how to effectively
respond to ads, what to do in chat rooms, and a great deal more.
The Master Dating Course
— This is simply all three of my books, wrapped into one, and priced at a huge
discount. If you want to master every angle of attracting women and being
great in bed, this is the book for you.
“I have received other manuals and none of them were as well
written as yours! I am impressed. It is easy to read and
understand. Your “secret pick-up-line” works!
The literature also goes into detail about confidence and
goals. I have read many other dating books/manuals and this is
the best! This is the first one that made me believe I can do
it! Thanks again John and good luck!”
Aarin E. – Utah |
|
– Read more testimonials from
readers of my books –
Online Dating
Site of the Month
Adult Friend Finder
Adult Friend Finder
is like most other online dating sites, but more sexually adventurous.
You’ll see nude pictures in personals, nude video chat, and the personals are far more sexually
descriptive. That said, Adult Friend Finder
a great site for finding someone with your
sexual likes, whether it’s for a relationship or fling.
With over 5 million members and over 15,000 members joining each
day, Adult Friend Finder
is easily the largest adult dating service on the Internet.
And with more adult personals to browse than any other adult dating
service, you have far greater chances to find what you’re looking
for. The nude personals and nude video chat are a pretty nice
perk, too.
Adult Friend Finder
also offers anonymous email, a hot list to save and find your
favorite people, and advanced matching to help you
find what you really want and to help others who have sexual tastes
similar to yours. In fact, here are a few of the items you can
search for:
- women seeking couples
- women seeking lesbian couples
- women seeking men
- women seeking women
- men seeking couples
- men seeking lesbian couples
- men seeking men
- men seeking women
- and so on
You can search for erotic adult chat, discreet
relationships, one-on-one sex, group sex, bondage and discipline, cross
dressing, kinky fetishes, exhibition and voyeurism, and so on. As you can
see, Adult Friend Finder
covers the whole spectrum of adult dating and sexual fantasies. And with
millions of personals to browse, you can be sure to find whatever you’re looking
for.
All in all, Adult Friend Finder
is the Internet’s largest and best adult dating service with great features and
over 5 million members.
What we recommend …
The best thing to do is to set up your free account. Then, login and
browse the “New Member Gallery.” You’ll see just how huge this
site is, and you’ll also get a great feel for the people you can meet.
Adult Friend Finder Features
| |
Adult Friend Finder |
|
Free
to Join
|
yes |
|
Post
Personal Ad Free
|
yes |
| Browse
Personals Free |
yes |
|
Nude
Personals Available
|
yes |
|
Nude
Video Chat
|
yes |
| Instant Messaging |
yes |
|
Chat
Rooms
|
yes |
|
Post Multiple
Pictures
|
yes |
|
Adult Friend Finder Ratings
| |
Adult Friend Finder |
|
Site Speed
|
4 |
|
Ease of Use
|
5 |
|
Quality of Pictures
|
4 |
|
Quality of Personal Ads
|
4 |
|
Member Size
|
5 |
|
Search Features
|
5 |
|
Total Score
|
27
of 30 |
|
Feedback
and Suggestions
This newsletter is here to serve and benefit you, the reader. So do not
hesitate to tell us how we can improve things. In addition, you are
encouraged to suggest article ideas and to let us know what you think of the
newsletter. Simply email us at the below address:
[email protected]
That’s it for this issue. Thanks for reading Sex and Dating Tips!
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